Mike Milo’s Journal

I’m working on some Maya scenes to add to my animation reel. Here’s the beginning of it. The lighting of course will be better and the knights will be superimposed on the blue screen but I’m happy with it. What do you think?

The teacher gave her fifth grade class an assignment: Get their
parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it.

The next day the kids came back and 1 by 1 began to tell their
stories.

“Johnny, do you have a story to share?”

“Yes ma’am. My daddy told a story about my Aunt Karen. She was a
pilot in Desert Storm and her plane got hit. She had to bail out over
enemy territory and all she had was a flask of whiskey, a pistol and
a survival knife.

She drank the whiskey on the way down so it wouldn’t break and then
her parachute landed right in the middle of twenty enemy troops. She
shot fifteen of them with the gun until she ran out of bullets,
killed four more with the knife, till the blade broke, and then she
killed the last Iraqi with her bare hands.”

“Good Heavens” said the horrified teacher. “What kind of moral did
your daddy tell you from this horrible story?”

“Stay the Fuck away from Aunt Karen when she’s drinking.”

A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife.
She was a very good-looking woman and determined to keep the ranch, but
knew very little about ranching, so she decided to place an ad in the
newspaper for a ranch hand.

Two cowboys applied for the job. One was gay and the other a drunk.

She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied she
decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around
the house than the drunk.

He proved to be a hard worker who put in long hours every day and knew a lot about ranching.

For weeks, the two of them worked, and the ranch was doing very well.

Then one day, the rancher’s widow said to the hired hand, “You have done a
really good job, and the ranch looks great. You should go into town and
kick up your heels.” The hired hand readily agreed and went into town one
Saturday night.

One o’clock came, however, and he didn’t return.

Two o’clock and no hired hand.

Finally he returned around two-thirty, and upon entering
the room, he found the rancher’s widow sitting by the fireplace with a
glass of wine, waiting for him.

She quietly called him over to her.

“Unbutton my blouse and take it off,” she said.

Trembling, he did as she directed. “Now take off my boots.”

He did as she asked, ever so slowly. “Now take off my socks.”

He removed each gently and placed them neatly by her boots.

“Now take off my skirt.”

He slowly unbuttoned it, constantly watching her eyes in the fire light.

“Now take off my bra.” Again, with trembling hands, he did as he was told
and dropped it to the floor.

Then she looked at him and said, “If you ever wear my clothes into town
again, you’re fired.”

(P.S. – Yeah, I didn’t see it coming, either)

Here’s a pic of another of my relatives, I beleive this was my great grand uncle Archie Tanguay.

One morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing and decides
to take a nap.  Although not familiar with the lake, his wife decides to
take the boat out.  She motors out a short distance, anchors, and reads
her book.

Along comes a Game Warden in his boat.  He pulls up alongside the woman
and says, ‘Good morning, Ma’am.  What are you doing?’

Reading a book,’ she replies, (thinking, ‘Isn’t that obvious?’)

‘You’re in a Restricted Fishing Area,’ he informs her.

‘I’m sorry, officer, but I’m not fishing.  I’m reading’

‘Yes, but you have all the equipment.  For all I know you could start at
any moment.  I’ll have to take you in and write you up.’

‘For reading a book,’ she replies.

‘You’re in a Restricted Fishing Area,’ he informs her again..

‘I’m sorry, officer, but I’m not fishing.  I’m reading’

‘Yes, but you have all the equipment.  For all I know you could start at
any moment.  I’ll have to take you in and write you up.’

‘If you do that, I’ll have to charge you with Sexual assault,’ says the
woman.

‘But I haven’t even touched you,’ says the game warden..

‘That’s true, but you have all the equipment.  For all I know you could
start at any moment.’

‘Have a nice day ma’am,’ and he left.

MORAL:  Never argue with a woman who reads.  It’s likely she can also think.

I thought I posted this painting on my blog here a while back but I can’t find the link for it so here it is again just for posterity sake… It’s called:The Artist Bares His Soul